by Dub86 » Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:23 pm I don't know if I'm using this right. I've never used a forum before.
I'm really struggling to control myself. I feel like I'm constantly on edge and ready to blow my top. I have agruments with my partner like any couple but I've found myself having to control my thoughts when we are arguing. I feel like I'm going to lose control and hurt her.
She doesn't know this. She just sees us argue then I walk out during but it because I have to. I worry if I can't get away from it one day I will snap. This isnt just limited to my parnter it can be with anyone.
My other problem is I have suicidal thoughts alot. I have a good life and don't generally feel depressed or down but sometimes I have to really watch what I'm thinking. Some times my brain says jump in front of that truck, or just step of the bridge.
I feel like I'm 3 people . 1 Angry aggressive person, 1 sucidial person and 1 normal rational person who it's trying to keep the other two in control. Rational me is getting tired constantly talking myself out of things
Feel a bit better for getting that off my chest nowDub86Consumer 0
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